In the Ramayana, it was time for the final battle between Sri Rama and Ravana. The latter arrived well-protected in mighty armor and a special chariot equipped with sophisticated weapons. Meanwhile, Sri Rama stood on the ground, in the clothes of a forest dweller, holding just a bow and arrows.
When Vibhishana noticed this situation, he was perturbed. He voiced his concern, “My Lord, Ravana has a special chariot, but you are standing on the ground. I am worried that this war is not going in your favor.”
Flashing his characteristic heart-melting smile, Sri Rama replied:
sauraja dhīraja tehi ratha cāka,
Rāmacaritamānasa VI-79-iii
satya sīla dṛḍha dhvajā patākā.
bala bibeka dama parahita ghore,
chamā kṛpā samatā raju jore.
The wheels of my chariot are valor and fortitude. Being steadfast in truth and good conduct are the two flags that denote victory. My horses are inner strength, discrimination (non-attached thoughts), self-control, and care for others. The ropes that form the reins of these horses are made of forgiveness, compassion, and equanimity.
Will the world accept me?
My mentor, Om Swami, is a radiant man who wears an ochre robe and has a fancy spiritual story of meditating in the caves. In short, he is the quintessential guru material.
Meanwhile, even though I have all the attainments to be a spiritual guru, I couldn’t picture myself as one. I fell into self-doubt, mainly due to the stature of my mentor. More so because I am a woman who lives with her family and has no spiritual travel stories to share. In other words, the most disrespected kind in the spiritual world.
Why would the world accept me as a guru? I pondered. This thought made me want to disappear into the shell and comfort of my beautiful inner world.
My husband tried to encourage me that I was capable, and my mentor showed his support via my dreams. My biological son and a few youngsters I mentor, too, believed I should take a step forward by following my heart. Still, doubts lingered.
Confident But…
As if by divine grace, I stumbled upon the above verse by Sri Rama which used to be my favorite as a teen. It brought a flash of insight.
I have fought numerous battles to reach wherever I am today, which needed inner strength and fortitude. I’ve never wavered from speaking the truth bravely, which even got me in trouble frequently. Plus, I practice mindfulness (self-control) and also care for others almost obsessively. As per Sri Rama, this meant Jaya, the goddess of victory, stood with me.
This gave me confidence in myself to function as a guru, but I now had another concern – What value would I add to my mentor working actively? Why do we need two gurus?
Don’t Compare!
”My family is scared of Om Swami, and they won’t let me follow him,” a woman said, sounding pretty sad. “With you, they just gave me a warning, but let me go ahead.”
Suddenly, it occurred to me that I had my work cut out! Many were thrown off by my mentor’s larger-than-life image. My woman-next-door appeal, which I thought was my shortcoming, turned out to be my strength, a blessing of victory in disguise.
So, here’s the lesson I learned from this episode as I gear up to accept the role of a guru:
We all have a space in this world. Comparison is pointless and detrimental. Like a piece in a jigsaw puzzle, we all are needed in the big picture.
Yet, I made a note to myself that it is always better to walk with humility because the puzzle pieces aren’t irreplaceable in the grand scheme of things!
Love,
Sri Devi Om
