On the verge of leaving for college, my son asserts independence in ways I never imagined. For one, he no longer lets me pack his lunch — he’s pretty skilled at doing it himself, putting together delicious recipes on his own. My husband, too, remains buried in his job except for our Saturday night dates. To top it off, destiny, disguised as my spiritual companion, has ensured I stop spiritual initiations and one-on-one life coaching.

Overall, the universe has given me an early retirement from my worldly duties, leaving me at a crossroads. This quieter phase of mine worried my mother, who recently accepted my initiation as Sushree Sri Bhuvaneshvari Om — no rules or situation can stop me from initiating my parents. This post extends what I told her about loneliness and “aloneness.”

Loneliness: A Sense of Disconnection

Solitude is often viewed as loneliness, but the two are very different. Unlike being alone, loneliness is a painful experience. It is a feeling of emotional or spiritual disconnect, which comes with sadness, isolation from people, and even a sense of purposelessness.

Loneliness can affect you even when you are surrounded by a crowd. I’ve experienced this myself and seen how disorienting it can be. It creates an emptiness that leaves us feeling lost and devoid of hope. It’s a lack of direction in life that weighs on the heart and makes us feel like a misfit.

Although we often associate loneliness with the absence of people, I have come to realize that it is something deeper. It’s a spiritual void that gnaws at your soul. This is not about who is or who isn’t around you but how you feel about yourself and your place in the world.

Being Alone: A Feeling of Connection

What I am going through now is a period of being alone, which cannot be remotely termed loneliness. It is a space where I am entirely free from the world and the demands of others.

For the first time, I‘m not juggling multiple responsibilities. I no longer bother responding or often even checking my non-personal emails and calendar.

Honestly, this compulsory alone time is what I needed to heal my traumatized body. It is the time to put myself on track to fulfill my calling: focus on my writing and longer sessions of meditation.

As you can see, being alone is not a burden but a blessing. The subtle difference here, as opposed to loneliness, is that I am not actually “feeling alone.” That’s because of the deep connection with the divine within.

Learning to Embrace Solitude

Long story short, I am alone but not lonely. When we are disconnected from ourselves, we feel sad and lonely. The moment we connect with the divine within, it changes into joy and solitude.

Being alone and spending time with myself has been one of the most empowering experiences of my life. It has helped me understand my thought patterns much more deeply than before. Longer meditation and writing sessions now fill not just my time but also my heart.

As the world continues to race on, I am in perfect stillness, garnering the motivation and courage to step into the next chapter of my life — to live like a complete renunciate, as my heart has always longed.

Trust me; this is the greatest gift doing your duties to your best while also adopting spirituality gives you — the ability to remain in solitude and feel whole, realizing that the divine is always present.

Love,
Sri Devi Om